So November is already ending. Christmas is coming. And soon it will be a new year 2014! Time really pass really fast. But then, what have I achieved? In all honesty, I am really disappointed with myself.
Well, through this past few years, I've grown up a lot. I've learned new things about myself, and have grown to accept different difficulties.
The ups in my life has been very few. And the down has been really low and dark. It is quite scary.
About my weight, it has fluctuated between 57kg to 54 kg. Today when I weighed myself, I was 55.5kg.
Many things have happened through these few years, at the same time, my life seems very boring.
I have quit the same school twice. Who does that? who quits school more than once. Ive been beating up myself about it, that i am just no "strong" enough. Mentally and physically.
that is one thing i aim to be, strong.
I realised I have many anxieties, that i never admitted to having. still everyday I am trying my very best to face my fears. but i wish it was easier.
For years, i used my weight to determine my life. There was a small period, around 6 to 7 months that i actually wasnt that obsessed about my weight anymore. I didnt even weigh myself everyday like i used to do. It was an alright period, but i guess it was because i was facing alot of other problems that distracted me as well.
A year ago, i started to develop trichotillomania. Not many people know about this "illness". Basically if you google about it, it is about the irresistable urge to pull out one's own hair. I still have this problem, although it is not extremely bad as a few months ago. I pulled out a huge HUGE chunk of my hair. I used to be really proud of my hair, cause It was very often that i was complimented on my hair. (i still do get compliments) I hide my bald patches well i guess. I will probably be uploading my progress with my trichotillomania here. I guess this might soon not only be a themed weightloss blog.
I'm trying my best to get my act together based on my weight again. My standard of life might be high, but in order for me to be happy, there has to be systematic order in my life. I have to be in control and in power of my life. eat probably, exercise regularly, do things that have meaning. Then i will be happy. the way I'm living right now is very embarassing.
Since last year mid, live has been a spiral of darkness and hopelessness (apart from a few small 'ups).
I was finally diagnoise with major depression
I started smoking heavily
I started drinking more
I developed trichotillomania, ocd, icd.
I went in to a coma once (on my birthday party)
I started smoking weed and taking drugs.
These are terrible things, and if i don't get my act together quickly soon, i think me and my life would be much worse
Nobody should live life like this. I know my life doesn't seem that tragic, in fact it's not. But living the way i live isn't something to be proud of either.
Everyone be strong.
Showing posts with label Weight loss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Weight loss. Show all posts
Thursday, November 21, 2013
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Then and Now- Legs and thighs
On the left is during May 2012, and on the right is my legs today 3 Jan 2013.
As you can see, ALMOST a thigh gap. I have very wide hips so I'm pretty sure if I tone and lose my fats more, I will have a pretty decent thigh gap. But my leg fats are very stubborn, so it's gonna take a while. I don't know if you see the progress, but I do.
Thighs are visibly smaller ( to me) , so are my calves.
A few days ago I was walking in my wedges, and my mum said: Darling, you have been working out right? I can see your calf muscles.
:>
I didn't do a side shot with my butts and legs, like on the 'Progress page' for the May pic, but basically.... I kind of lost my butt!
Weight update and 2013 weight plan update LATER :)
Btw, HAPPY NEW YEAR.
As you can see, ALMOST a thigh gap. I have very wide hips so I'm pretty sure if I tone and lose my fats more, I will have a pretty decent thigh gap. But my leg fats are very stubborn, so it's gonna take a while. I don't know if you see the progress, but I do.
Thighs are visibly smaller ( to me) , so are my calves.
A few days ago I was walking in my wedges, and my mum said: Darling, you have been working out right? I can see your calf muscles.
:>
I didn't do a side shot with my butts and legs, like on the 'Progress page' for the May pic, but basically.... I kind of lost my butt!
Weight update and 2013 weight plan update LATER :)
Btw, HAPPY NEW YEAR.
Sunday, October 7, 2012
Weight updayet #3
October 7 2012- 54.6kg/ 120.1lbs
That means I lost 5kg / 11pounds starting from 16 April.
That's around 7 months. Oh wells.
That means I lost 5kg / 11pounds starting from 16 April.
That's around 7 months. Oh wells.
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Weight update
16 April - 59.6kg / 131.1lbs
17 April - 59kg
4 May - 58.6kg
3June - 58.4kg
6 June - 58kg
7 June - 57.7kg
13 July - 57.5kg
14 July - 57.2kg
16 July - 56.7kg
29 July - 56.7kg
2 August - 56.6kg
16 August - 56.5kg
2 September - 56.3kg / 123.9lbs
Weight lost: 3.3kg / 7.3lbs
Almost 5 months and only 3 kg of fat has been burnt off.
Weight loss has been pretty slow, but at least there is weight loss. I have been exercising more frequently again, but I have not been very strict on my diet. So that's probably why the weight is not dropping any quicker. Might get stricter and tougher on my self as time goes by, cause the fats are getting more and more stubborn! But I've seen some progress with my body that I am quite happy about so far!
17 April - 59kg
4 May - 58.6kg
3June - 58.4kg
6 June - 58kg
7 June - 57.7kg
13 July - 57.5kg
14 July - 57.2kg
16 July - 56.7kg
29 July - 56.7kg
2 August - 56.6kg
16 August - 56.5kg
2 September - 56.3kg / 123.9lbs
Weight lost: 3.3kg / 7.3lbs
Almost 5 months and only 3 kg of fat has been burnt off.
Weight loss has been pretty slow, but at least there is weight loss. I have been exercising more frequently again, but I have not been very strict on my diet. So that's probably why the weight is not dropping any quicker. Might get stricter and tougher on my self as time goes by, cause the fats are getting more and more stubborn! But I've seen some progress with my body that I am quite happy about so far!
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
About Amber Heard's weight loss/ How did she do it?
Q: How much weight did Amber Heard lose?
A: 25 pounds.
Q: How long did it take Amber Heard to lose the weight?
A: It took her four months
Q: How often are Amber Heard's workouts?
A: She had daily workouts.
Q: What is Amber Hear's diet like?(When she wants to lose weight)
A: She bans carbohydrates and alcohol.
Q: What is Amber Heard's diet like? (to maintain weight loss)
A: She avoids meat, eggs, diary products and processed sugar. She has a low fat and high fiber diet. She eats foods such as whole grains, soy products, vegetables, brown rice, millet, barley, rye. Vegetables makes up 30% of her daily food intake.
Q: What does Amber Heard like to eat?
A: She likes having 1-2 bowls of miso soup or shoyu soup
Q: What is Amber Heard's workout like?
A; She does cardio and some light weights. She goes jogging everyday. When she is very busy, she just tries to fit in running. "I personally run, just because that’s all, for me in time management, running seems to be the most time" She said.
Q: What does Amber Heard do to control her diet?
A: She makes time to cook and buy whole ingredients. Amber prefers to make her own food so that she can control what ingredients go in (mostly vegetables and lean protein). Amber reads food labels — and if she sees an ingredient she doesn’t recognize, she often leaves the item on the shelf. That might limit you in the snack aisle, but it will lead you to eat fewer processed foods.
A: 25 pounds.
Q: How long did it take Amber Heard to lose the weight?
A: It took her four months
Q: How often are Amber Heard's workouts?
A: She had daily workouts.
Q: What is Amber Hear's diet like?(When she wants to lose weight)
A: She bans carbohydrates and alcohol.
Q: What is Amber Heard's diet like? (to maintain weight loss)
A: She avoids meat, eggs, diary products and processed sugar. She has a low fat and high fiber diet. She eats foods such as whole grains, soy products, vegetables, brown rice, millet, barley, rye. Vegetables makes up 30% of her daily food intake.
Q: What does Amber Heard like to eat?
A: She likes having 1-2 bowls of miso soup or shoyu soup
Q: What is Amber Heard's workout like?
A; She does cardio and some light weights. She goes jogging everyday. When she is very busy, she just tries to fit in running. "I personally run, just because that’s all, for me in time management, running seems to be the most time" She said.
Q: What does Amber Heard do to control her diet?
A: She makes time to cook and buy whole ingredients. Amber prefers to make her own food so that she can control what ingredients go in (mostly vegetables and lean protein). Amber reads food labels — and if she sees an ingredient she doesn’t recognize, she often leaves the item on the shelf. That might limit you in the snack aisle, but it will lead you to eat fewer processed foods.
Friday, July 29, 2011
Thursday, March 17, 2011
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